A job you hate, but it's a job

????Dr. Terri Orbuch, a professor at the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan, runs the Early Years of Marriage Project. Funded by the National Institutes of Health, it's the longest-running study of marriage ever conducted, following 373 couples since 1986.

????Orbuch distilled the results of that research in a new book, 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great (Random House, $26). One of her key findings: "Happy couples talk about what happens at work, even if it's 'boring' or unpleasant," she says. "For years, the conventional wisdom was, 'Leave work at work!' But it's a huge part of your spouse's world, so why not make an effort to understand what's happening there?" Just allowing him to vent -- without chiming in with urgings to get another job -- may ease a lot of the pressure he's feeling.

????"You can also try exercising together, maybe by taking a long walk two or three times a week," Orbuch adds. "Exercise is a tremendous stress reliever." True.